October 2001

By Barry Jones

It has been a great effort for me to write this month's column. I mean with all that has transpired on September 11th how can I get into a so-called normal routine? Everyone has been affected in some way, shape or form. It could be a friend of a friend, a relative, a close friend, or a friend of someone you work with. There has been no discrimination. Even everyday things have to be looked at differently. Going to work, going to school, it's all changed. I personally look at things in life differently now. The first weekend after this disaster I received a nasty email from someone. I remember looking at it and not reacting and I remember saying to myself gee with all that has happened and is about to happen in the world, this person is focusing on me? How shallow can you be?

The good that has come out of this tragedy is we have become much more united. It is a shame that it takes a tragedy for this to happen, but it is happening in every community. Everyone says we need to go forward and get back to normal. That is easier said than done. Especially since we might go to war, and with the fact that we must be more careful with all that we do whether it be getting on an airplane or being so frightened that you think twice about going in a tall building again. The bottom line for me is I love being who I am, I am happy to be alive and with all that has or is about to change I am proud to be an American. Like I said it has been difficult for me to focus, whether it be writing this column, working my real job, or doing my work at GALFOLI I have just been feeling that its all been so unimportant compared to what's going on.

There is a person though that has really impressed me. I have known this gentleman for a number of years and worked together with him at PWAC-LI. This gentleman has had numerous personal tragedies in his life and seems to always go forward with great style and grace. He always is helping or supporting whether it be an individual or a not-for-profit agency. I am very honored and feel very proud to have him in my life and on our board of directors of GALFOLI. His name is Tony Scardace. Tony is part of the recovery crew at the World Trade Center. This is a very dangerous and emotional job, which I don't know I would have the strength to do. I speak to Tony often and he tells me of what he does at the site daily. So hats off to Tony Scardace and all the other people involved in any form of recovery for tragedies such as this.

I constantly receive emails from people asking me to put the word out on fundraisers, meetings or outreach for their agencies. I recently received a couple of emails about health issues. "Socially Speaking" is about the community and all that is going on, including services. Having volunteered for PWAC-LI for so long I believe it is important to get the word out on what's available so each individual can make his or her own choices.

Lisa Zimmerman of Brookhaven National Laboratory would like the community to know there are studies being performed by the lab pertaining to HIV and the brain. The National Health Institute funds these studies. The understanding of how HIV affects brain functions will lead to better strategies for those infected with HIV. If you would like more information please contact Lisa at the Brookhaven National Laboratory at 631-344-2773.

Also there is a special weekend retreat being offered by the Little Portion Fairy. It's for all persons living with HIV/AIDS and their supporter/lovers/friends and caretakers. It is designed to be an encouraging, supportive weekend that will be an opportunity for people to talk about their lives and how they live with the virus and the impact their spirituality has on the quality of their life. For more information please call 631-473-0553 or email mtsinaifriary@aol.com. There is no fee it is the brothers gift to the community.

We all remember the Matthew Sheppard candlelight vigil that LIGALY held a couple of years ago right? It was a tasteful, serene and informative vigil, hosted by David Kilmnick of LIGALY, which united our community and showed that we will not tolerate any type of hate crimes. On Thursday, October 11th in observance of National Coming Out Day and recognizing the one month anniversary of the terrorist attacks at the World Trade Center and the Pentagon, Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth (LIGALY) will hold another candlelight vigil entitled Long Island Gay and Lesbian Youth Remembers. The vigil will take place from 7:00 PM to 8:30 PM at the Bay Shore band shell located at the intersection of Main Street and Park Avenue in Bay Shore. Over 200 people are expected to attend which features youth speakers a band and chorus and prominent community speakers. [This event has since been rescheduled for Friday, October 12th at 8 PM -- Ed.]

And speaking of LIGALY I have been having a great time attending meetings at the facility. I am on the committee to work on their upcoming fundraiser, "The Pride Benefit Prom for Adults". Mr. Kilmnick is very fortunate to have a staff like Lenore, Joe, Rob and Yvonne. Also on this committee are Louis Trapani, Brenda, Jim Coppola and Jim Pizzo. Talk about unity in the community!!!!! The prom slated for Saturday November 3, is sure to be the place to be. All moneys raised will go directly towards services for GLBT youth and their families. For ticket information or if you would like to place an ad of support in their journal. Please call 631 665-2300.

I recently ran into Stephen Flynn recently and he wanted me to remind the community about The 4th Annual Gay and Lesbian Film Festival. The festival, which has become one of the major events of the year, has some great and diverse film choices. Some of the other activities planned for this major event are panel discussions, luncheon, special guest appearances by select cast and crew of the films being presented and many other surprises. For more information please visit their great web site www.liglff.org. The festival is Thursday, October 11th through Sunday, October 14th. It will be the place to be.

I had a great time at 'The Rocky Horror Floor Show' hosted by our lady of the hour Camille Gnolfo. The fundraiser for breast cancer support held at the newly remodeled 'Forevergreen'. We had our audience participation bag and we were ready. It was a great performance; most notable was Ms. Ellen Lambert with her strong voice and great presence, but more on this and the upcoming two-day event in the next Socially Speaking.

Upcoming Events:

3rd Annual Old Brook Road Tour of Terror benefiting Babylon and Huntington Breast Cancer Coalitions on Friday Oct. 19th & 26th and Saturday, Oct. 20th & 27th from 7 PM - 11 PM; Sunday Oct. 21st & 28th 6 PM - 10 PM; and Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday Oct. 29th, 30th & 31st 7 PM - 10 PM. For children under seven years, hours are Sundays from 1 PM - 4 PM. The tour is well worth the suggested minimum donation of $5 per person and goes to support the important work being done by these coalitions. For more information call (631) 957-7112. Group rates and private tours are available.

The Sixth Annual Winter Ball, Dinner, Dance & Celebration benefiting the Long Island Pride Parade on Sunday, December 2nd from 6:30 PM - 12 AM at the Westlake Inn in Patchogue. $60 per person, ticket sales in advance ONLY. Seating is Limited. Ticket Deadline: November 28, 2001. It will be the event of the season! For more information or for tickets call (631) 321-0906

Please email me at SocialSpeaking@licktheweb.com, if you have any comments about this column, questions about any of the people or organizations mentioned or would like an event covered.

Other Socially Speaking Columns

Photos by Louis Trapani © 2001